There’s a photo showing me in my early 30s on an island in the middle of a lake, with my two sons, aged about 3 and 4. The sun is shining and we all look happy. I look young, fit, and slim. The photo gave me a feeling of envy; I wished I could be like that again. But back then I wasn’t aware of those qualities or I thought negatively about them. I probably thought that I was old. People start saying they are old in their twenties, for fuck’s sake.
In 20 years time will I look back at myself now with the same feeling of envy, maybe for my mobility, lack of pain in the joints, ability to sleep? I need to appreciate myself as I am now, rather than wait until it is all gone.
People say that youth is wasted on the young. But middle age is wasted on the middle aged, just as much.